Christian Relationships - Helpful Summary Highlights of "Blueprints for a Solid Marriage"
Christian relationships, as defined in this writing, are simply relationships among Christians. For example, the relationships among members of a church, among the Pastor and officers, among the officers themselves, and so on.
The following are some summary highlights of a book that I read as a marital enrichment resource - Blueprints for a Solid Marriage by Dr. Steven Stephens (Carol Stream, Ill: Tyndale House Publishers, 2006).
However, I think that it has principles for Christian relationships beyond marriage. Please use what you can and pass the resource on to others for their edification.
1. Trust and commitment are essential.
2. Entry way – commitment projects. Commit to oneness, positive communication, growth, and honest.
3. Closets – emotion projects. Work on emotional awareness, analysis, articulation, and management. Talk through emotions without blame. Look at The Five Love Languages (Gary Chapman).
4. Kitchen – practical projects. Negotiate united approaches to financial management, parenting responsibilities, and house hold chores. Give kids deep roots and strong wings.
5. Dining room – social projects. Your spouse can't meet all of your special needs. Work on having Christian relationships with couple friends and same gender friends. Accountability groups and mentors couples may be helpful.
6. Family Room – recreational projects. Sports, relaxation, fun and laughter, weekly dates, and get aways are urged.
7. The Study – intellectual projects. Work on learning and exploring together. Discuss your though with one another.
8. The Hallway – conflict projects. Conflicts help but quarrels hurt. We need each other like porcupines in the cold. Do more than your fair share. Identify the real issues (e.g., to be right, self protection, to be respected, etc.). Use "I" statements. Resolve via accommodation, acceptance, or compromise (don't mention again and act kindly towards one another).
9. The Safe Room – crisis projects. Addiction or compulsion can be a substitute for the spouse – work, alcohol, sex, gambling, eating, etc.
10. The Patio – aesthetic projects. "Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we respond to it" Chuck Swindoll. You can complain about apple seeds or plant them. Think, speak, befriend, and do positives. Simply life and enjoy solitude.
11. The Master Bedroom – sexual projects. Plan great sex, instead of an add on. Look at The Loves List by Leslie parrot. Communication, intimacy, and a least weekly sex are keys. Look at The Five Levels of Love by Gary and Barbara Rosberg.
12. The Addition – future project. "If we're not looking forward, we will grow stale and die (p. 172)." Dreaming and supporting each other's dreams in Christian relationships are keys. Conquer fear with positive persistence. Leave a great legacy – writings, pictures, mementoes, and ministry.
13. The Foundation – spiritual projects. Spiritual togetherness is essential for marital longevity, satisfaction, and pleasing God. Fun, entertainment, things, comfort and ease don't satisfy for long.
14. Keeping It All In Order – garage. Communicate, problem solve, and comprise toward that which is mutually comfortable. Increase the energizers and decrease the energy drainers.
15. There is a nice appraisal to work on at the end of the book. Get help as needed.
I pray that these summary highlights have been helpful to you with Christian relationships. Click Blueprints for a Solid Marriage to review and or purchase the actually book.
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